Alexander. J. Bulloch's Blog.
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
An unnamed Norwich City Council representative has described recent events as "political correctness gone mad" after plans were announced this afternoon of a new initiative to increase the number of blind taxi drivers in the city to record numbers in an attempt to radically cut taxi waiting times.
Up until now, the taxi driving profession has completely excluded the blind community, reasoning that they cannot actually see anything, but with new laws coming in from Brussels to promote equal rites and anti-discrimination for all European Union citizens, the cities streets will be changed forever as such outdated considerations and predigests will be swept aside as the visually impaired take to Norwich's roads.
To aid the transition of this new initiative from the faceless beaurocrats in Brussels into everyday Norfolk life and to increase public awareness, the so named "senseless taxis" will be white in colour and will be proudly promoting the logo of a golden retriever wearing mirrored sunglasses on each door.
Driving the scheme will be advances in the art of guide-dog training. The dogs will sit in the front passenger seat of the taxi, barking once for left, twice for right and three times for stop. Customers are strongly advised not to distract the dogs; as such actions will probably lead to a loss of human life on a colossal scale.
Customers are also being advised by the newly formed Association of Blind Drivers that to shorten journey times and to keep costs down, it will be helpful for the passenger to read out loud any relevant road signs to the driver, as otherwise drivers will be forced to get out of the taxi and locate the nearby Braille road sign equivalent.
Assuming that everything goes well with this new initiative it could open many new previously closed career opportunities for the blind and visually impaired community such as traffic police officers and flying airplanes. A spokesperson for the Royal National Institute of the Blind Mr Norman Glaucoma, has labelled this venture as a brand new day for their members and has strongly called on the DVLA to issue driving licences to all blind people when this new technology becomes available to all later in the year.
posted by Alexander. J. Bulloch.
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