From John and Steph

September 1, 2005

I, for one, cannot believe it has been a year. In one sense, it seems like yesterday. It was the La Grange Wednesday ride like so many before it, a group of us working together maybe 2….3…minutes behind the main pack racing to the top of Mandeville Canyon. About a half mile before the top I got a flat which put me alone and behind. The rest is history.

On the other hand it has been a very long year. From the time I “awoke” 10 days after the accident I was filled with optimism as to when I would be back on my feet, back to work and back on my bike. While still in I.C.U., I talked someone into giving me a phone. My first and only call was to my employer, I assured them that I was fine and would be back at work “in a week or two”. Oh, how they must have laughed after we hung up! I would have laughed…and I do now when I think back to that phone call. As time wore on the realization that my recovery would be longer then I had planned crept into my mind. I continually set short term overly ambitious goals for me. As each one came and passed without being attained I would set another. Until about May when I really gave in and said to myself “what will be, will be” and on a time line that is completely out of my control.

Medically, things are looking up. The surgery I had on my pelvis in March proved to be very successful. Although, there was a time when I was sure I still was going to have problems. My pelvis has since healed and is feeling solid. Considering all the hardware it has it is probably stronger then it has ever been. When I quizzed my doctor on this issue he stated “my pelvis is so tough I could get hit by a truck”……huumm, no thanks…been there, done that.

I do have surgery planned for late September or early October on my urinary tract. I will be in and out of the hospital pretty quick and with some grace it will be may last surgery on that issue.

With the foot things get a little murky and without going into too much detail I will summarize my situation. I have met with 2 neurologist, both have tested me and concluded that the damage to the nerves below my knee are all but assured to be permanent. Currently, I have no muscle activity below the knee and my foot is in a twisted position. I have met with a foot surgeon that tells me that he can correct the position of my foot with serial casting and major surgery. First, he proposes to put me in a cast and then change that cast ever week or so in effort to manipulate my foot to a more acceptable position. Secondly, he would surgically remove 3 bones from my foot and then screw what is left all together. This will give me a flat walking platform but will also limit me and my lifestyle. The other alternative is to amputate my foot. Side-by-side, the two alternatives have their advantages and disadvantages and it is a very very difficult decision to go one way or the other. However, I have decided that an amputation may be the best for me. Surprisingly, this is a relatively simple surgery and if I coordinate it correctly between the surgeon and the prosthetisist the down time should only be a matter of weeks. The major drawback, besides loosing a piece or me, is that the cost of a prosthetic foot is not covered by insurance. Yet, all things considered I believe I will be better off in the long run with an amputation. So that is it in a nut shell.

Over the last few months I have come the furthest as far as how I “feel”. I feel on top of things more then at any other time in the past year. I go to Daniel Freeman Hospital 3 times a week for physical therapy and I am on the lifecycle at least 3 times a week. I stretch and follow a pretty consistent exercise routine. I am told that all the muscles above the knee should return to normal over time and with exercise. All this activity (not to mention the reduction in medications I take) has increased my energy level and mental acuity. As such, I am really anxious to get back to work and I am actively seeking employment. As most of you know I am an attorney, however, I am a “young” attorney. After 15 years in the construction industry I put myself through junior college then the University of California, San Diego. After that I attended the University of Missouri, Kansas City Law School. Finally, I was admitted to the California bar in June of 2003. All this to say, that just as my new profession was getting off the ground it was abruptly halted. For those of you who say “let me know if there is anything I can do for you”….Please, if you know of anyone that may be interested in speaking with someone with my background pass on my name. Thank you.

Bottom line is that all-in-all things are going well. I believe the worst is behind me and from here on out I will just have to learn to live with a few permanent inconveniences. One of my original goals (besides returning to work “in a week or two”) was to ride Mandeville on the one year anniversary date. Clearly, that is not happening. But, maybe, by next year I will have a dedicated cycling foot which will allow me to get out there and ride again. Maybe next year on September 1, 2006 I will ride with the La Grange bike club to the top of Mandeville Canyon and then go to work!

Thank you for your continued support,

John

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April 25, 2005

Time for an update I thought of as I left Dr Johnson’s clinic this morning, so here it goes.

My last update was just days before I went in for surgery on my pelvis. As I mentioned the original “bone work” just did not take the way we all had hoped (especially me). This time Dr. Johnson went in and did a bone graft. He cut a piece of bone off my left side pelvic “wing” then crushed up this piece and packed it into the suspect area. To minimize my stay in the hospital after surgery I did everything I could to “look” comfortable when the doctors rounded on me each 6:30 am, the more comfortable I appeared the more willing they were to let me out, notwithstanding, other complications of course. It worked well, in fact 3 days after my surgery and at about 6:45 am they let me know I could leave that day. One of the first things you learn when within “hospital culture” is that there is real time and then there is hospital time. Stephanie and I sat there all day expecting, at any moment, a nurse to come in and tell us we were free to go! I may have been told I was going to be discharged at 6:45am but it took right through to 5:00pm for that nurse to finally arrive.

Now backing up a few steps, after surgery Dr Johnson told us the surgery went well and as planned and that is about all he said (a pretty quite guy). Special thanks go out to my favorite nurses that made my time in the recovery room bearable. IF there is a living hell on earth, the recovery room has got to be it! Of all my time and experiences over the last 8 months the worst memories have got to be the time spent in the recovery room (15 surgeries = 15 visits to recovery). Pain. Noise. Moans. Fog. Groans. Pain. It is a necessary evil, I understand that, but I really hate that place. (did I make this point too strong?)

The 6 weeks since surgery have shown some signs of healing and improvement over the weeks just prior to surgery. Unfortunately, I don’t feel the real problem has been corrected. Although, I am much more mobile, I can sit longer and move around more easily. However, there is a nagging and deep feeling of bones separating on my pelvis when I move in certain inconsistent ways. I spoke with Dr. Johnson about it this morning and he assured me that it could take up to 12 weeks for this type of healing to occur. 12 weeks! Did he just say 12 weeks! Suddenly the 10 weeks I fervently complained of some 7 weeks ago seems pretty rosy. Trying to help and be a little proactive I did convince the doctor to CT scan me so that he make take a closer look now. The last thing a want to do is find myself 12 weeks out, still in pain and then have the good doctor start searching for answers. And is just so happens that I will be in the hospital next Monday!

May 2^nd, that is the date for my next surgery and then there is 1 more to go after that (that I know of anyway). This one has been a long time coming and is of a delicate nature to discuss. So I will leave it at this: I have had a catheter exiting the right side of my abdomen for the last 8 months, if things go as planned I will be FREE of it forever!! Unfortunately, I do see the recovery room in my very near future and another 3 days in the hospital. Pray for me on this one. Nurses where are you?

For the longest while I have been keeping a very low profile. I try to keep my mind busy, I have been able to do bits an pieces of legal work for some friends, but it is scary to take on too much considering the amount of medications I take daily. Mostly I am keeping my body as settled as I can. I cannot afford to do ANYTHING that could jeopardize the healing process. Remember, if this healing process does take 12 weeks then there is 2 months of learning to walk after that! 12 weeks puts me into June and learning to walk takes me into August, and of course, September will be 1 year since the accident. How did this happen? Our plans, both financial and emotionally, had me back to work by mid-February. Sometimes it is all too much to think about. However, my recovery has been punctuated with some fun here and there. First, Stephanie bought me a Playstion2 and the game Grand Turismo 4 soon after getting home for my last surgery. I have spent plenty of time playing and attempting to master this game. It has paid for it self already in entertainment value.

Second, Bill (my brother & best friend) came down from Seattle for a weekend of fun and male bonding. This also afforded the opportunity for Stephanie to get away. So she went to San Francisco to visit her sister who is attending the Conservatory of Music there. The trip for her was much needed, deserving and long overdue. She and her sister had loads of fun just hanging out (shopping). Meanwhile, back down here, my brother and I pretty much did one, or a combination thereof, of 3 things at all times 1) Play Grand Turismo, 2) watch movies, 3) order & eat. As you can see in the photo we were very competitive.

Third, My sisters came out for a visit too, one from Maine and the other from North Carolina. As I’m not very mobile I couldn’t keep up with them, and I ‘m not sure I could have even if I had all my parts in working order. They packed a lot into the 5 days they were here. The visited me every morning and brought me my beloved Starbucks and, if they were not too worn out (Because they sure wore out Stephanie), we had diner together. No matter what, it was great to have family around and it was a wonderful change of pace.

So here I am, feeling not healed, wondering if I am actually healing and trying not to panic about the upcoming months. If there is a continued problem with my pelvis, which requires more surgery and/or delays my return to work and life there are many ramifications. So far we have been able to get by but the state stops disability payments for my injuries on September 1^st. I do not have a job nor can I feasibly look for one right now. Those are the type of issues that we are really trying not to think about, at lease for another month. Over the next 30 days or so we should really be able to tell if my pelvis is truly healed or were my hypersensitivities and gut feelings correct. And as Dr. Johnson said this morning, if there continues to be a problem then (I am really paraphrasing here) “we will just go in and figure out another type of plate and screws that will work”.

But, for now, not much has changed, getting physical therapy once a week, moving as little as possible and praying very hard that the end to my pelvis problems will be right around the corner.

Finally I would like to thank my newest group of supporters, the folks of www.Roadbikereview.com. I have been a member there for years and once the other members got wind of my story they have been very supportive. Thank you.

Feel free to drop me an email (colnago@redwire.net) and until the next update, ride safe!

March 9, 2005

Hi all,

First let me apologize for taking down the last update where I explained exactly what happened (as I recalled it). But there was good reason behind removing it.

So on to the new update, some of you have learned that my “back problems” turned out to be non-fused areas of my pelvic bone. As a result, I have been crutching around with a still broken pelvic. It is no wonder that I have been in so much pain and have spent the better part of most days lying down. Between that and morphine I have been able to keep myself relatively pain free. Since learning of the problem my orthopedic quickly put the kobash on my physical therapy. So, I have been keeping myself busy with movies, music and Grand Turismo 4 (A special thanks goes to our friend who is a member of the Directors Guild).

On the other hand, it is great to know the source of my problem. Today I am going in for another CT scan with the results they will be able to look at my pelvic bone in a 3D format. From there my doctor can plan out what, where and how the new titanium plate will go in and be secured. The “when” is next Thursday March 17, St. Patrick’s Day. Yippee. As much as the thought of the OR, and even more so the recovery room, turns my stomach it is nice to know that the problem has been found we are doing something about it.

Aside from the actual surgery there are two other downsides I have to deal with, the first is that I will be “non-weight” bearing for another 10 weeks after the March 17^th surgery. Second, the surgery that was set for March 21^st in my abdomen has had to be moved to May 2^nd. And if this is not enough as soon as I get off my crutches, I need to have surgery on my left forearm, after which I should regain full mobility again. So as you can see I am going to be “tied” up for some time.

My original plan was to be back to work by February 1^st or the 15^th at the latest! Obviously, I was not able to make those deadlines. Given the unknowns of my recovery, I may not be able to even begin looking for a new job until late May. Frustration abounds.

By the way, if anyone is in need for a slightly gimpy, ambitious “young” lawyer with 15 years practical “life” experience, email me!

Thank all of you once again

John.