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Keep in mind, these are not scientific statistics, just general approximations based on the experience of my immediate circle
of moms. The most important thing to note is that each baby's numbers vary so much, you should never trust the averages you
read about in books or hear from your friends or your pediatrician. Some friends of mine reported that their 5-month-old
was sleeping 12 straight hours every night, and I mistakenly took this as a promise!
I know I make everything sound so negative, but the intention is to make you feel better when you have these terrible
thoughts and worries in the early months . . . they are normal! And everything does change.
*When will my boobs settle down?
Well, the milk comes in (euphemistic term for painful adjustment to milk production) around 3 days after birth, and it
can be awful. Luckily, this subsides in a day or so, though pain from engorgement and nipple chafing takes another few days
or weeks. For the first 3 months or so, your boobs will remain pretty hard and tempermental (i.e., if you wait too long to
empty them you get a plugged duct; the baby gets into a phase where he latches poorly and your nipples get bruised, etc.).
But after a few months, they soften up and start to work effortlessly most of the time.
*How long does one breastfeeding session last?
In the beginning, it can take a long time: about 45 minutes or so to arrange your pillows, attempt to get a good latch,
keep the baby from falling asleep too soon, etc. And since you need to start all over again about 1.5 hours after the session
begins, it seems like you are just nursing non-stop. After a few months, you can get the job done in 15 minutes. Note that
some babies just eat faster than others; it's a crapshoot.
*How long does colic last?
Usually, it starts at 3 weeks and ends around 3-4 months. Note that there are 2 forms: one that occurs mostly in the
evening (traditional colic), and one that goes on continuously day and night (possibly related to GER (acid reflux)). You
can try lots of tricks (see Harvey Karp's Happiest Baby on the Block), but often there is just nothing you can do except hold
the cranky little man while he cries, and get lots of help to relieve you.
*When will I start to really enjoy spending time with the baby?
About 3 months, when they start smiling at you. Until then, they almost don't seem human!
*How long before you feel like yourself again?
Physically, 3 months; psychologically, 6-12 months?
*How many diaper changes a day?
About 7. If it's only pee, it can wait, because modern diapers have super-absorbent gel that keeps them really dry.
Poop usually takes the form of a massive explosion that can't wait, and may occur 5 times a day in the early months, or once
every 5 days later on (if breastfeeding)! Two poops a day is a decent average. Note that after a short time, they stop pooping
in the night altogether!
*How much do they weigh at different ages?
Charlie was extra big, and he gained about half a pound every week from birth to 6 months. For a general idea, though,
here are the Baby Gap clothing sizes:
0-3 months = 7-12 pounds
3-6 months = 12-17 pounds
6-12 months = 17-22 pounds
12-18 months = 22-27 pounds
18-24 months = 27-30 pounds
This should help you when you're buying containment products, which usually have a weight limit. (For example, Charlie
outgrew his car seat at 5 months because he was already almost 20 pounds).
*When do they start eating solid food?
At 6 months. Before this, their digestive systems are immature and need only breastmilk, and after this they begin to
need iron supplementation and get hungrier.
*When do they get their first teeth?
Around 7 months (usually between 4 months and a year).
*When do they start to roll, sit, stand, crawl and walk?
This varies, but usually they remain limp blobs for several months. It's easier when they can hold their head up a little
(around 3 months); then they start rolling and get frustrated all the time because they can't roll back (around 4 months);
then they can sit up and entertain themselves (around 6 months). I think crawling comes around 8-10 months, and walking around
1 year. Please don't worry too much about milestones, though. Charlie didn't crawl until 14 months, and still isn't walking
at 17 months . . . and this is still within the range of normal.
*How many hours does the baby sleep at a time?
For the first few weeks, they usually sleep in unpredictable chunks of 15 minutes to 3 hours, then wake up for 30 minutes
to an hour. This goes on day and night. After that (age 1-3 months?), they will start to sleep longer chunks during the
night, but not by a lot: they wake up to eat probably 4 or 5 times a night. There is no "bedtime" delineation for
a while, since they are never asleep for more than 3 hours at a time. And keep in mind that, depending on the baby, you may
have to spend 30 minutes to 2 hours each time he wakes up, rocking and bouncing him to calm him back to sleep. For example,
you might sleep for 1 hour, then bounce for one hour, then sleep for two hours, then walk around for 45 minutes, etc. You
often have to wake up fully and do exercises (not just roll over and stick your boob in the baby's mouth, half-asleep). At
around 4 months, if you are lucky, they start "sleeping through the night" -- which, unfortunately, is technically
defined as 5 consecutive hours. As a rule, this is the first 5 hours, so from 7 pm to midnight or thereabouts. After that,
you'll be getting up every 1-3 hours like before! By about 5 or 6 months, many babies do sleep through the whole night, but
many take a year or more to get to this point. At about 6 months, you can initiate sleep training, which usually helps a
lot. 4 months, though, is when you can expect to be able to have a loosely predictable schedule (i.e., bedtime is at 7:00pm;
3 night feedings; wake up at 7:00am; morning nap, early afternoon nap between, late afternoon nap).
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