Japan Society of Fairfield County
Culture Watch, Society Watch (7)
by Dr. Ikuko Anjo Jassey
Recently we expanded our master bathroom and
added a small sitting room attached to our bedroom. During the time
when this project was progressing, I had a fascinating "first-hand"
linguistic and cultural experience. In Japan, to admit a fault bravely
is considered a virtue. We all know anyone can make a mistake;
therefore, Japanese people buy the person's honesty when he/she admits
a fault and apologizes for his/her words or actions. (Oh, well, the
world of politics and diplomacy is a different story.) In the United
States, however, honesty is not considered necessarily the best policy.
One day I noticed that one of the
saddles for
the bathroom entrances was a wooden saddle, though we had given our
carpenter two granite ones. So I asked him, who was our builder's
elder brother, why he did not use the granite one. "Oh, it's just
a temporary one. I'll place the granite saddle later," he
replied. I didn't question why he did not use it in the first
place, because I assumed that he, as a carpenter, must have had a
better idea. During the next two weeks, the frames of the door as
well as all the tiles of the bathroom were installed; however, the
wooden saddle had not yet been replaced with the granite one, which
fact provoked me to question the reason. This time he said
casually, "That one broke." He said it as if the granite saddle
had committed suicide, jumping out from his hands without listening to
his desperate call. Thus, a beveled mirror of the cabinet for our
second-floor bathroom also committed suicide with the carpenter's
abetment. In both cases, the carpenter never said even a word
about his breaking those materials until we finally asked.
Besides, we never heard him say, "Sorry." On the other hand, if a
Japanese carpenter broke your property, he is expected to say, "Sorry"
immediately, and he will do so deferentially. Furthermore, in
order to take the responsibility of his action, he will make clear who
broke it by saying, " I broke it by mistake." I assure you that a
Japanese carpenter would not say "it" broke as if the object itself
were responsible for the damage.
I have no intention to judge which cultural
value
is desirable. I am fully aware that what our carpenter did was
not unusual in American culture. In this lawsuit society, what he could
do as an emergency measure was to avoid referring to who did it in
order to evade his responsibility. By the way, our builder eventually
sent us a bill of two hundred thirty dollars for the new mirror,
regardless of being notified that it was his brother who had broken our
mirror!
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