The View From the Outback

• Thoughts While Staring at the Ceiling Fan
• The Iraq Poker Game
• Senator Trent Lott Shot Himself in Both Feet
• Wall Street Journal  "Media Whore" Re-Visited
• Let's Run Over to Nuevo Laredo For Dinner and Get a Five-Year Prison Term
• Ineptness in American Business Abounds
• Suggested Reading From Past Columns

"What Would Jesus Drive?" My guess. He would drive a stake through the hearts of the morons who are using his image in the anti-gas-guzzling-vehicle campaign.

Here is another example of how unions inhibit efficiency, and in the case of New York City, contribute to the heavy tax burden and current fiscal crisis. The Municipal Transit Authority (MTA) was very close to calling a strike. The contract was finally ironed out. One "concession" by the union is that station cleaners will be allowed to change light bulbs at subway stations. The old rule required an MTA electrician to change a bulb. Electricians make twice as much as station cleaners. One is reminded of the old Aggie/Polish/MTA (whatever) joke. How many MTA electricians does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to hold the bulb and two to turn the ladder.

Nine plans have been proposed for the site of the former World Trade Center towers. Four of the proposals would create the tallest building in the world, higher than the 1,483-foot Petronas Twin Towers. If you are a betting person, don't put any money on plans that call for buildings taller than the original 110-floor WTC. Finding tenants for such a project might prove to be difficult. Making such a building safe and easily evacuated would be a monumental task. New York City should get over its obsessive desire to be the "biggest and the best" of everything. It is a great city. Simpler and safer buildings about on par with the current skyline will be just fine. And they probably could find tenants, if the building does not stick out and invite an attack. Find me one person who would be comfortable working on the 115th floor of a building in NYC. (see: www.renewnyc.org)

If I were President Bush's image consultant, I would have him tone down his "weight-lifter walk." There is a difference between a confident and purposeful stride, and a belligerent stride. The President works out with weights. He walks stiffly, with little arm movement, and with his chest thrust forward. This comes across to me, and I am sure to others around the world, as belligerent and bullying. It is the wrong body language. Again, there is a difference between being strong and confident and being a bully. Maybe the Prez should consider adding Pilates to his routine, so that he would have more flexibility. In Marine boot camp, we were taught to walk and march in a specific manner. I still walk that way decades later. It is a strong and controlled walk, without bobbing up and down. But it surely isn't a "weight-lifter's walk." I never noticed any lack of respect by those who saw me or my fellow Marines walking down the street.

Now that Al Gore has said he won't run for Prez, the Democratic beehive has opened and the drones are flying about - getting ready to start stinging each other. In an earlier Outback ("Sen. Tom Daschle for President - How Absurd," January 12, 2002), I commented on how little chance Lieberman, Daschle, Gephardt, Edwards, and Sharpton had to become president, regardless of the Republican opponent. A poll seen on NYC TV asked who would be the favorite of Democrats in NY. Lieberman 23%, Kerry 20%, Al Sharpton 14%, Gephardt 11%. If I were Dick Gephardt, I would drop out of consideration right now. Beaten by the Rev. Al Sharpton in a poll? What a disgrace. If you are unfamiliar with Al Sharpton's record and method of operation, do a little research. He is another Albatross around the neck of black Americans. Maybe Dick Gephardt should consider not even running for re-election to the House. Beaten by Al Sharpton in a poll? Goodness gracious.

(Here is part of a footnote from the Jan. 12, 2002 Outback article about Daschle and other Democratic presidential candidates:

* Regarding Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton, I liked the comments from Al Hunt in the WSJ for Jan. 10, 2002 (I usually don't agree with him on anything). In "The Phony Protest ... and Leaders," Mr. Hunt is talking about the phony protest against the president of Harvard for some remarks he made to a professor of African Studies. Al says, in part, "But then Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton seem often irrelevant, relying chiefly on a press that feeds and strokes the faux conflicts on which they thrive.")

Navigator is 7.0 has been updated to version 7.01 and is a free download at www.netscape.com. You can download the entire file for installation offline, which means you can move the file to another machine and install it. Why Microsoft Internet Explorer continues to make us download a file and install it directly from the Internet is still a mystery. About the only new feature I noted in Navigator 7.01 is an ability to disable "pop-up" windows. For those who do not have either Ad-Subtract, Norton Internet Security 2002, or a similar pop-up killer, this is a nice feature. More and more, I like Navigator's TAB feature, with several Tabs open at once.

Adobe. PDF files are ubiquitous - and rightly so. A new version of the free Acrobat Reader is available (V. 5.1) for download at www.adobe.com and many other sites. I don't know what new features or bug fixes it might have. My rule is: If it is free and I use it a lot, download the latest version. They must have improved something.

HBO ran a program about a brothel in Nevada. As far as I could determine, the going rate for an hour is $1000 to $1500! This proves that men have no sense. For that amount, you could buy a LA-Z-BOY recliner with built-in massager and heat pad - and enjoy the benefits for possibly 15 years. I know, I just bought one. A much better investment of $1000. I have money left over for a few cases of wine. With the promise of a heated massage chair and a glass of wine, I can get plenty of women to show up at the house, at no charge.

New York City, for many years regarded as one of the highest crime cities in the country, has turned things around. Mayor Bloomberg said that in a survey of crime in about 216 major cities, New York City was 197th down on the list. That makes it one of the safest cities in the country. As Hiz Honor pointed out, NYC is safer than Provo, Utah. Incredible. Too bad that the evening news out of NYC, which I watch now and then on satellite, quite often leads with a murder story. They have had 548 murders so far in 2002 - in a city of 7 million plus. Still that is about two a day for the news to cover. Media geniuses. Good job of spreading the message about how safe NYC has become.

One of the best messages regarding race in this country was passed on by a recent series of shows on JEOPARDY! Willie Holmes is a black truck loader and bartender. He was up against lawyers and eggheads of all types for three days on the show. He won $39,000 in two days, and was beaten on the third day by a fellow who bet a lot on a "daily-double" and jumped ahead of Willie. It was so much fun to watch those in the white elite on the panel as they consistently got beat to the punch by a black truck loader and bartender. Frankly, they were stunned. A lesson in humility.

Mark Green, who ran for Mayor of NYC, among other posts, gave a lecture (carried on C-SPAN) on campaign finance reform. A couple of points jumped out. He claims that most congressmen and senators spend up to 6-hours-a-day involved in raising money. He said that in running for Mayor of NYC he made 30,000 phone calls (begging for money) in two years. The Supreme Court is part of the problem, in that they declared money donated to campaigns as "speech," and thus caps on financing might be a violation of free speech. What a pathetic perversion of the First Amendment. The Court has another chance to rule on the issue with a case before them. Maybe this time they will come to their senses. Money is speech only in the phrase "Money Talks."

Tom Brokaw continues his Nightly News miscues. On 12-11-02, he said: "Putting a Mother Hold on Hold." He was leading into a segment about women who delay having children. The lead was obviously written as "Putting Motherhood on Hold." If not, somebody is in big trouble. I am going to drop the subject, but as one who has some "cognitive difficulties" at times, I feel Mr. Brokaw's pain.

After watching about 25 portions of Defense Department press briefings by Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld, I have concluded they are mostly a waste of time. Rumsfeld has been around Washington so long, and is so glib, that he can give a five-minute answer to a question which never answers the basic question. The answers sound grand, but usually tell you nothing of substance. Rightfully, he refuses to discuss strategy, troop movements, and future plans. What does that leave? Not much. The reporters would be better off hanging around the Pentagon cafeteria hoping to pick up some scraps of real news.

First, athletes and sportscasters brought "you know" into our language as filler at the start, middle, and end of sentences. Even foreign politicians who come on TV speaking fluent English say "you know." It is incredible. Now, the same cretins who brought us "you know," have infected us with another linguistic virus, "I tell you what." It is a guy thing. I don't hear many women saying it. I have written the presidents of sports at CBS, ABC, NBC, and FOX and begged them to put out a memo to their announcers to be mindful of not saying, "I tell you what." Fat chance that anybody will care or even try to stop.* "I tell you what" is completely useless. I would like to identify the person who first brought us this gem. My suspicion is that he resides somewhere in the South, and it first appeared in our lexicon as: "Ah tell ya whut, bud."

(*Update: Dec. 23, 2002. I got a personal letter from the president of one of the major sports networks. He said that my comments were "right on the money," and that he would put out a memo to his production teams.)

In an earlier Outback, I mentioned that we had become the dumping grounds of the world and that everyone had learned how to game our systems. Cities which border on Mexico are facing a crisis in their hospital emergency rooms. Sick Mexicans drive across to U.S. hospitals and are treated under the terms of a 1986 statute that requires Emergency Rooms to treat illegal aliens and those who cannot afford to pay. ER care in Texas for illegal immigrants cost the state $74 million in a recent year. One day, when we are broke, this country will wake up to all the ways that outsiders are draining our economy. Dear Congress: revise the 1986 statute this next session. Strike the free-medical-care-for-illegal-aliens clause.

The Iraq Poker Game

The White House press secretary says from the podium, "This president does not bluff." Maybe so, but he has either been bluffing to some extent or using poor judgement in getting everyone riled up and nearly resigned to an inevitable war with Iraq.

First, we were going to invade Iraq without support from the world community. And the evidence upon which the invasion was predicated seemed speculative - unless the administration had some hard facts they were not sharing with the public.

When the "we'll do it alone" gambit seemed to backfire on the U.S., the president went to the United Nations and gave a great speech. He should have done that in the first place. It was time for the U.N. to put up or shut up, and his speech and his constant threat of unilateral war caused the U.N. to face up its responsibilities.

So, weapons inspectors were to given unfettered access to locations within Iraq. And there was the heralded report from Iraq of their inventory of weapons of mass destruction. When there were apparent discrepancies, many thought the President (who is not bluffing) would start the invasion. So far, inspectors had an opportunity to inspect only a handful of sights. And a much larger contingent of U.N. inspectors will finally get on the ground in Iraq. I never thought Bush would invade based upon the "false WMD report" handed over by the folks in Iraq.

But, because of his constant drumbeat of how evil Saddam is, and the buildup of our military in the region, our Secretary of State was asked at a press briefing if this phony Iraq WMD report was a "material breach," why were we not invading? He finds himself in the role of trying to keep up with our constantly-changing posture as to what will trigger an invasion.

The entire world, including much of the American public, thinks that President Bush is looking for any excuse to invade Iraq.

In the meantime, one would hope that we have a huge bounty outstanding for the assassination of Saddam. There have been public meetings of the Iraqi opposition, outside the country, who are talking about what kind of government might be put in place post-Saddam. And there is an effort to convince the Iraqi Generals to turn on Saddam rather than be tried as war criminals in the probable event that Saddam would use chemical or biological weapons if invaded.

So, there are a lot of good things going on. But every day, the president gives us the impression that we will invade Iraq at the slightest provocation. This, I'm sure, is causing a lot of thinking in the power centers in Iraq. But, it also is cause severe anxiety among the American population and among most of our allies who fear that a pre-emptive invasion by the U.S. and possibly Britain would have serious negative effects in the entire Arab and Muslim world.

Give the inspectors a chance, even if it takes a year. How much of a serious threat can Saddam be with hundreds of observers on the ground popping up here and there unannounced? With spy satellites and drones overhead? And with fighter-jet cover over much of the country? In due course, the CIA may even develop some high-level sources in Iraq. We might actually find out what is really going on.

If the inspectors find some WMD stockpiles or manufacturing capabilities, then go back to the U.N. and challenge them once more to do their duty. Only if they refuse to act with force, should the U.S. even entertain the idea of a unilateral invasion.

Saddam might die from an illness. Where is Dr. Sidney Gottlieb of CIA and his poisons when you need him? Dead. Does Saddam have a weakness for Godiva chocolates? His food tasters can't taste everything he eats - or there would be nothing to eat. Where does he get his toothpaste? Use some imagination, although we never got to Castro this way. Maybe we are smarter now than we were then.

The Iraqi people have suffered enough under the rule of Saddam. We would add to that misery by bombing their cities and destroying their infrastructure. All the smart bombs in the world cannot bomb military items hidden in civilian areas without killing innocent civilians.

This has been a masterful job of inciting a country (the U.S.) to riot. Riot against Saddam and go in there and kick his ass. It all sounds good on TV and looks good on paper. Most of the people who have bought into this idea probably never served in the military or spent any time in the Middle East. As a former Marine, federal agent, and CIA agent, the idea of the U.S. invading Iraq unilaterally, with the scant evidence we now have of its WMD capabilities, turns my stomach.

I would not want the job of being the one to knock on the door of the parents, wives, sweethearts, brothers and sisters of the Americans who will be killed if we invade Iraq unilaterally. Not unless I had a better story than "We think he poses a future threat to us. He probably has weapons of mass destruction. We have evidence that he has in the past worked on the development of an atomic bomb." That's hardly enough evidence for a search warrant, let alone a war.

Think back the Cuban Missile Crisis. There were missiles with atomic warheads aimed at our cities from only 90 miles offshore. The military brass, for the most part, wanted to invade immediately. President Kennedy chose another strategy, which did not require firing a shot or dropping a single bomb.

Now, we have a less-clearly-defined threat, which is thousands of miles away. The leaks out of Washington are that the military chiefs are not keen on a unilateral invasion of Iraq. They have learned the lessons of history. This time, it is the President who has been pushing the invasion.

Bluffing is not inherently bad. If you are confronted by a large bear in the woods, banging two sticks together and yelling might cause the bear to retreat. So, if by some miracle the situation in Iraq is resolved without an invasion, a massive bluff will in the end have been a pretty good tactic.

Senator Trent Lott Shot Himself in Both Feet

The remarks by Senator Trent Lott at the Strom Thurmond birthday party were taken out of context. I watched the entire birthday party for Strom Thurmond, which was aired on C-SPAN. Senator Lott had been praising Thurmond's general agenda of lower taxes, a strong defense, and smaller government. When he got to the part about how Alabama voted for Strom and how we would be better off if the country had followed his policies, I took it that he meant if the country had followed Thurmond's Conservative agenda.

As old as I am, I did not recall that Strom Thurmond had run on a platform of segregation. Nor, I suspect, did 99% of Americans, until the Democrats and the elite media seized on the issue. Sen. Lott lost his leadership role over a matter that really meant nothing. As J.C. Watts, the black congressman said, Lott was just complimenting an old man at a birthday party. That was how I saw it as I watched the entire event on TV.

What really did Lott in where the inane and overboard apologies, including one on Black Entertainment TV (BET). Lott apologized for his "hurtful" remarks, although there is considerable question as to whether he had made any hurtful remarks. He apologized for not voting for a federal holiday for Martin Luther King, Jr., which was simply groveling. The MLK birthday was a vote in Congress in which blacks used blackmail, if you will, to brand anyone as racist who did not vote for MLK day.

Why not a Leif Erickson day? And on and on. There are possibly a hundred people who deserve a "day" as much as MLK. But they have no constituency. Once again, Mr. Lott bowed to racial blackmail and said he was sorry for not voting for MLK day.

And Sen. Lott says that he is favor of affirmative action. Ridiculous. The leader of the Republican party in the Senate saying he is in favor of affirmative action. Hell, even thinking blacks are not in favor of it.

Finally, the Republicans in the Senate could take no more. The Republicans publicly plotted his removal as leader.

In retrospect, I imagine Senator Lott wishes he had released the following statement and refused further comment:

"My remarks at Sen. Thurmond's birthday party were in praise of his conservative values and in no way did I intend to endorse his very early views as a segregationist. Nor did I intend to imply that we would be better off if we still practiced segregation. I am not in favor of segregation and think that all people, of every race, color, and creed should be treated equally. If I said anything that was construed as being racially insensitive or offensive to any group, I apologize. But in fact, my remarks were meant only to compliment a distinguished senator on his long-held conservative values. Any suggestion that I meant to endorse segregation is a distortion of those remarks. If you review the text of my entire comments on that occasion, rather than take one sentence out of context, you can better judge the spirit in which those remarks were made. I will have nothing further to say on the subject. Nothing can be gained from more discussion about what other people thought I meant by my remarks at the Thurmond celebration. I know what I was thinking at the time, and I believe I have made that clear today."

Now, we are treated to the spectacle of Republican senators coming on camera and saying that Lott did the right thing in stepping down. They cite his "insensitive" and "hurtful" remarks. Excuse me. Even his own party is kicking him when he is down. All to pander to the racist blackmail of the black voters, whom they so desperately need.

I was delighted that the controversy brought out that Democratic senator Robert Byrd had been a member of the Ku Klux Klan. It helped vindicate my often scathing criticism of him. Isn't the double standard by liberals and the media fascinating. Democrat Robert Byrd can be a former member of the Klan, actually a recruiter, and use the words "white nigger" in an interview, and nobody pays any attention. Blacks vote for Democrats by huge margins. Go figure.

Wall Street Journal  "Media Whore" Re-Visited

In the Outback for Dec. 7, 2002, I had a piece entitled "My First Nominee For "Media Whore" at the Wall Street Journal." The WSJ article I focused on appeared in the Nov. 26, 2002 issue. It was about how Alberto Gonzales, the White House counsel, was running roughshod over the Constitution. One area of Ms. Cummings' focus was his work on establishing military commissions. Another was the legal status of the detainees in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba. The subtitle of her article was: "White House Counsel's Methods Outrage Military Legal Experts." I sent a copy of my Outback article of Dec. 7 to Ms. Cummings and to the Managing Editor of the WSJ.

In the WSJ Letters section for Dec. 6, 2002 (which I had not yet read at the time I wrote my article), the Judge Advocate Generals of the four services, three Generals and an Admiral, responded to Ms. Cummings.

In part, they said: "Thus, contrary to the suggestion in your article, the counsel to the president did not cut out uniformed military lawyers in making decisions on the war on terrorism."

Thanks, guys. I am glad to be in such good company in questioning the reporting of Ms. Jeanne Cummings.

Let's Run Over to Nuevo Laredo For Dinner and Get a Five-Year Prison Term

A federally-licensed Texas gun dealer attended a gun show and asked his associates to unload weapons and ammo from the vehicle. They then went to dinner across the Mexican border. There were still 200 rounds of ammo in the vehicle and the dealer was arrested by Mexican police for bringing ammunition into Mexico - a felony. The man was sentenced to five years in prison - without a trial! He got out of the Mexican prison in four months under a reciprocal agreement that Americans can serve their time in U.S. jails.

After he served his time, which was cut short, the now-convicted felon tried to get his Federal Firearms license reinstated, but the BATF would not allow it. Under Federal law, felons cannot own guns or be dealers. The U.S. Supreme Court upheld the BATF ruling. Denying predatory felons the right to have guns is one thing. Allowing the inadvertent carrying of 200 rounds of ammo into Mexico to be judged as a felony is stupid by the Mexicans in the first place. My guess is that the ammo did not fit the guns in use by the Mexican police, or the police would just have taken the cartridges and wished the travelers a nice dinner. Refusing to let the man with a Mexican conviction (without a trial) pursue his trade as a U.S. gun dealer is even more stupid.

I'm a former BATF agent and enforced our gun laws. This is the most ridiculous set of circumstances and the most outlandish opinion by the Supreme Court in this area that I can ever remember. Think about this. A man is now denied his livelihood because of an inadvertent (one must presume) act to which the Mexicans overreacted. And the highest court in our land has said it all makes good legal sense. Another example of why I left the BATF after only a few years service. They have their head up their ass - and then the courts agree with them.

The BATF could have used some common sense and reinstated the man's license. There is no law that you must enforce every law to the letter. Laws are there to be used to prevent and deter criminal activity. In the BATF, I quite often found myself helping business people and innocent civilians find ways around - and through - some of our more stringent gun laws.

For example, is there any reason to deny a convicted check forger or a shoplifter a right to own a gun to protect himself in his home? The entire law needs to be revisited by the Congress.

The law ought to read "a felony conviction for a crime of violence or related to drugs" - or at least something pretty serious. And that the conviction was in a U.S. Court, since there are a lot of trivial things an American can do in a foreign country and get convicted of a felony.

Sometimes our Supreme Court acts like it lives in a hot-house and has never met anyone other than those in the court building and those who come to plead cases.

What if you took part of your prescription drug supply and put it in an unmarked container to take on vacation in Mexico and were arrested and sentenced for drug smuggling? What if you took a dozen different unmarked vitamins and herbal supplements on vacation in an unmarked box? Is there not a chance that you would be arrested for drug smuggling? And on and on.

I have for some time been planning a trip deep into Mexico, and even considering moving there - if Hillary ever runs for President. This case grabbed me by the lapels. No mas. No way, Jose! That is, no way will I even drive into Mexico. I have a lot of guns and ammo. Who knows how many rounds might have fallen under the seats over the years?

Yesterday, under the seat I found 100 .45 caliber bullets that I have been intending to take to a friend who is a reloader of ammunition. There might even be a small handgun that I forgot was in the truck, which got wedged in between the seats. I know, I have too many guns if I can lose one and not notice. I found a flashlight wedged between the seats that I had "lost" over a year ago.

Enjoy your country, Senor Fox. Promote tourism all you want. I will not be darkening your doorstep, not by crossing the border in my pickup, that's for sure.

Ineptness in American Business Abounds

One of my business mentors has an IQ of about 180, with an engineering degree and an M.B.A. from Harvard. I used to wonder how he kept his sanity in a world with so many inept and sometimes stupid people about him in everyday life. There is a lot to be said for being of average intelligence and never having a creative thought. It is a less stressful lifestyle.

I spend much of my days banging my head against the wall with the ineptness of so many people in the business world. Recently, I shipped two boxes of electronics, with an insured value of $3000. I have to drive to a nearby town to deal with a "drop-off" point for one of the major delivery services. I handed the man a printed page, with 18-point type, with the name of the company for the TO: part - and my name and address for the FROM: part.

When I got the receipts, the boxes were shown as sent by RICHARDS RHOADES. My name is RICHARD RHODES, as was made clear on the printed sheet I provided. One receipt was in upper case and one in lower case (and the address labels?). One of the two stickers, that contained the tracking number, was torn in half and only the partial sticker affixed to the receipt.

When I pointed out the errors and omissions to the shipping forwarder, he said that none of that mattered, the boxes would get there. Doesn't matter to him, maybe. The boxes did make it to the destination. I was able to track one of them to the destination, and later used the fragment of the other tracking number to construct a couple of guesses, one of which worked. One reason they ask you to print your Return Authorization number on the box is that at least they have a chance of discovering who sent the boxes.

I hope that when I die there is no afterlife. I don't want any chance of running into this moron again.

COPYRIGHT 2000 Richard C. Rhodes

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