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Clayton Williams Texas Republicans had high hopes that this rootin' tootin' cowboy multimillionaire would take over the Governor's Mansion in 1990. But they would have had better luck if Claytie had been more like cowboy Tom Mix, the silent film star. It seems that Claytie's jawbone wasn't connected to his brain bone, so he came up a few cows short of a stampede. In other words, he wasn't elected. He was no match for quick-witted State Treasurer Ann Richards. You remember her -- the 1988 Democratic National Convention keynoter who brought down the house when she said George Bush was born with a silver foot in his mouth. Unlike Ann, Claytie could never make it in standup. Talking to reporters about the weather -- which most folks would consider a safe subject -- he joked that bad weather is like rape: "as long as it's inevitable, you might as well lie back and enjoy it." Sounds like the boy did some prison time. Things got worse when a convicted rapist repeated Claytie's bad joke and got sentenced just a week before the election. Then Claytie bragged about his days as a young buck when he crossed the border into Mexico to pick up prostitutes. Well, so much for the Mexican vote. The ladies weren't too impressed with that, either. And his extreme wealth became a liability when he admitted that he had paid no income taxes in 1986. His excuse: he had a bad year. Folks don't want to hear that when you're a multimillionaire. |
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